Shine.

Soooo
I havent had a girlfriend since the 11th grade!!!!!
I mean Ive been on dates but nothing worked out.
I was pondering this thought on my way home from Volleyball tonight!

I have been talking to alot of people about relationships and marriages and I realize the ever more importance to wait.
I look back on my past of dating around and realize how dumb it was, but at the same time very rewarding, only in the sense I know more of what I want then ever.
But I feel some people rush love..
I look at the peoples relationships who talk to me about their problems and they all say the same thing, I should have waited.
How insecure do you have to be to have someone right now?
I think its a empty feeling that you wont let God heal.
It was my problem for the longest time.
I have saved apart of myself to give away to a lady when really I should have given my whole self to God.
God is love and all good works out for those according to his purpose.
I write to those who read this blog.
Enjoy waiting.
Dont play around.
Be honest.

now that Im past that.
Ive been thinking about things I really like
and Here is a list.
I want my wife , or if I never have one, to have a friend who looks past my crooked teeth and love handles and enjoys me for these qualitys: These are things I like, and enjoy.

1. foam soap
2. Pauly shore
3. glasses( on other people)
4. facial hair
5. long hair
6. laughing
7. star gazing
8. elizabethtown
9.a good acoustic tune
10. writing
11. playing guitar
12. singing
13. windows down
14. cowboy boots
15. cereal
16.water, no soda
17. hugs
18. hand holding
19. braclets
20. strangers, but I love people so it shouldnt make the list, its who i am.
21. books.
22. coffee
23. skateboarding
24. dryer sheets
25. fresh smells
26. dogs!!!!
27. running
28. working out
29. playing outside..... alot
30. hiking
31. to just relax.

enough with the list.
I found I really enjoy chilling out.
Laying in my floor listening to music that makes you feel inspired.
I love breakfast.
I overthink and think to deep.
Jesus is my first love and best friend, I often treat Him like crap but I do desire to know Him more.
At the end of the day I pray about all my choices.
Favorite 2 verses
john 15:16
1 john 3:23
I also can love anyone, but not just anyone can love me.
I dont get moody, just think alot.
My mind is always moving.

I just felt like writing a blog.

odds of being alone-Trent Dabbs

Well crap..

So it wont let me make a new one.
so that means I have to keep this one


So I'll write on here, no big deal.

I think girls overlook the fact that guys can be insecure too.
I've been doing this not dating stuff and its been wonderful, I mean yes I want a girlfriend, but there are so many people that need my attention.
and my youth kids will prevail, everytime.

I will finish this later, I just feel like reading and not writing at the moment

Well crap..

youve read my mind for long enough now

I have 2 new ones
one you are welcome to read, the other you wont find.

enjoy.

Homeward bound.

2nd Corinthians 5 kind of scares me...

Paul is writing to the church of Corinth and is defending his ministry
in verse 4 he says " we who are in this tent groan"
Paul is talking about his body being a tent and his home is in heaven.

Paul is basically saying... " I cant wait to be there."
Now I know this is something I never wrote about but these are my thoughts, wonders, and ponders..

I'm not really excited about dying or going to heaven...
I don't wake up every day saying " Hey, I'm ready to die and be with Jesus."
Have you ever met those people?
or maybe heard those preachers say" Lets pray for Jesus to come back."

I look forward to waking up everyday to spend time with Jesus
I look forward to another chance to figure out love, life, and how I can grow deeper with Christ.
Lately I've been struggling alot with the voice of God, what I should do and where I should go..
And I'd like to know these things ya know?
I look forward to the future and honestly I'm not really ready for Christ to come back.
I would like to grow more without seeing Him..

Now, I know you think this is crazy
but I'm starting to realize the beauty of not seeing Christ and walking by faith
verse 7 walk by faith not by sight
I love the fact that Jesus is everywhere and I cant see Him
and its up to me to realize this..
thats the beauty of being alive
maybe one day I'll look forward to Homeward bound

so..
I don't think its wrong to not desire to die and go to heaven
I'm praying about it.

Really quick on prayer
I don't pray that much..
I pray pretty much all day
but I never really have a serious convo
I think the more open we are with Christ and tell Him whats really going on
healing can really begin.

Anyways
I just felt like writing

love you

so it has started...

Its not something I want to think about...
I don't even want it coming into my mind..
but its unavoidable...

John 21 Jesus looks Peter in his eyes and says " and someone else will tie you and carry you where you don't want to go."

Jesus tells Peter...... that he will die for the glory of Jesus.

My mind is filled with this as I finish the book the barbarian way.
I find myself finding the real point of life.
Jesus didnt save me to bring me to a life of comfort... of fluffy pillows and soft beds but one that requires me to carry a cross, to wherever I need to carry it too.

Its hard letting that sink in my head.
That it might not be my purpose to ever see marriage, a job, or the age of 40.
but its also hard to deal with the thought of being just another "christian"
who watchs the world cry its self to sleep because they didnt share the love of God with someone.

I'm currently going to Mississippi state for college and I dont like it not one bit.
People, I mean everyone up here talks about each other..
I recently even caught my best friend talking about me.
I cant stand it here...
It seems like no one is real... no one is searching..
but at the same time I'm so drawn to this place.
Its amazing the chances Jesus took on people.
He was so hated but He even found time to sit at a well and meet with the broken..
to ask of others that spit on Him..
He even found time to die for these people...
I to hope my life can be lived in a manner that these people can see the trueness of Christ.

I have dreams ya know
and the top of the list is to fall in love, but Im slowly starting to see that my happyness is not the point, the point is to win souls for God.
He is seeking people that would seek Him, and all it takes is someone saying yes to the call.

I've never been the cheesy Christian who said thinsg like " Im ready for the Lord to come back." cause Im not
I love life.
But I'm slowly starting to become someone that wishs we could all worship together.
Everyone needs Christ and learning this is so new.

done for tonight.