Monday, May 3, 2010

Comb my hair

The last week..... of the last 2 years or my life of community college.
How do you say goodbye to the friends you've made and the memories that make you?
2 years of community college changed my life.
I realized the point of life really is to love.
So I will start here

You want love
I want love
to give it
receive it
experience it in full....
everyone searches for love.
I've met so many people and this is the only thing I found in common with all of them..

Why is it that as a people group we long for the touch, affection, and whisper of love?
Why is it that we all try to find that "something" to fill this love void?
I'll answer this later...

When I was a senior in High School I liked this girl from Heritage Academy, for the sake of the post and her privacy I'll call her Sue.
yeah.... Sue fits..
I met Sue in the a.c.t before my senior year started.
She had beautiful blue eyes, dark hair, freckles, and the cutest nose!
She really loved and cared for people, like a mom instinct on roids!
Her heart would break for those that were hurting around her.
She was pretty and I wanted to know her..... so I laid the mack down. :)
Of course she fell for me, I was a natural charmer and well, I had skills.
I really fell for this young lady.
And since this is my blog I can say what I want without caring if anyone who reads this and get mad.
She was wonderful. We dated on and off and finally dated last January were I ended it after 2 weeks.
I didnt understand...
She was perfect!!!!!! Really..
But my heart was burdened.
And my God hole in my heart would not let this star shape Sue fit in, even though I loved her as Christ would, she just could not fill what I needed to be whole.
After that my life got crazy
I started to really seek Christ, and He let me find Him..
I was booked for the next 2 months pouring out love to churchs and people groups that I was traveling to speak at...
I was pouring out this faded misunderstood love.
I couldn't understand love and why it wouldnt let me be with someone
Along the way I've met other girls, honestly no one that I really clicked with.
All my fault though cause I was empty and Christ was not getting my full attention.
I forgot that God was love, that He is jealous, and I shouldnt leave Him dry for my love.
Because thats not love, the 5 minute "hey God how are you" or the " forgive me, I effed up big time."
No thats not it.
I continued to date ....
which was a terrible idea...
I later met a wonderful gal from I.C.C named.... Martha, yeah, Martha.
She could sing!!!!!!!! and play guitar!!!
but her square shape couldnt fill my God sized hole.

later after her came one that was pretty amazing, sandy.
She was a triangle.

I went on, over looking the fact that God's love is simple, but can easly be made complex.
But why make love so complex?
Its not math
you dont need tools, or instructions, or love for dummy books.
Love is simple
here it is..
Love.... is love.

For century's man has tried to prove God wrong but its not happening
because love lives
though I might not ever understand the love Jesus had for me, I know its love.
I know love is patient kind and etc.
But it also love
ya know?
I think you will feel it when you do..
You just know love.

I know Christ and I can for sure know I'm in love with Him.
After the hardships, arguments, and breaking up comes a beautiful sunset
which God knows I love, and sometimes I pray on my face and dance in my room to worship, because I know He loves that.

This is love my friends.
No need for me to go deeper.
Love is real because God is real
and God is real because love is.
No other religions mention love more, google that mess, I did.
Christ is the only " figure" that actually spent time with the sick and unrighteous, He waned to know us, so He experienced what we do.

You dont have to understand love to have love, but you do have to realize some where along your path of life, some shapes dont fit with other shapes, and forcing them only causes damage.

Im going to call it on this one, dont want to over write.
Today I enjoyed the love of Christ.
Simply by throwing the fresbee with my good friend Samuel Bragg, who doesnt get a fake name.
We sat down with the word and he confirmed my salvation.
Acts 16;31 believe on the lord Jesus and you will be saved.

Thats all I had to do.

My hole is not fitted with the goodness of life
though I still look for a woman, I now know what I want , and I know God knows the desires of my heart and what I need
a natural loving Christ woman
who is very smart
beautiful
athletic
shy, but not to much
musical minded
and a romantic.
and is happy to love my indecisive mind , crooked teeth, nappy hair, and finds real love in how much I love my God and my people.

have a great day.
Nothing fits me better then a God shape, and my other piece is out there.

Everyone wants love, so
get it.
Christ said its a free gift

I need to comb my hair;/

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